People’s Park blind-date corner: Where seniors seek companionship amid youngsters’ marriage pressure
Print Edition
THE last Saturday of 2025 was a bit cold in Shanghai, especially in the early morning. Yet, as soon as the main gate of People’s Park opened at 5am, a stream of people — mostly middle-aged and elderly individuals — poured in, hurrying to claim spots to display personal advertisements. Typically printed on A4 paper, these ads contained details about their unmarried children, with the sole purpose of helping them find spouses.
Most of these unmarried young people are well-educated and hold decent jobs, with a noticeable number being young women. One ad introduced a 1992-born woman working as a physician at a public hospital in Hongkou District: She holds a master’s degree in medicine and stands 164 centimeters tall. After a brief conversation with us, the mother standing beside the ad pulled out two photos of her daughter, showing a young woman with a pleasant appearance and a good figure.
But working at a hospital in a big city has its downsides: The physician is extremely busy. The night before, she returned home after 10pm, when her mother had already gone to bed. The following day, a Sunday, she would fly to another city for a conference.
She is looking for a man born after 1989, at least 175cm tall, with a comparable education and a steady income.
It is not easy. The mother has been searching intermittently for three years. The daughter recently agreed to meet a guy but took to her heels on seeing his receding hairline.
As a father with an excellent but unmarried daughter noted, you can find no faults with these women, except for their age.
Another individual was more cynical: Age often turns out to be the least troublesome issue with these women.
In comparison, the chances of finding the right spouse seem to be higher for another age group: pensioners.
On the east side of the park, along a shaded path, Peng was guarding a long row of laminated A4-sized papers outlining the requirements, all handwritten in his own elegant script.
Peng runs a modest agency that charges each client a fee of 300 yuan (US$43) for a three-month display at the park, where the blind-date fair is held on weekends only. In addition, the agency offers recommendations on WeChat groups. These relatively low charges attract many senior clients, including those born in the 1940s and 1950s.
Standing in front of the display was a woman with most of her face covered by a mask, yet she was attentive to the conversations happening nearby. When asked about her identity, she pointed to a notice in the display: surnamed Li, born in 1953, a Shanghai native, 160cm tall, divorced, with an adult daughter living separately, and a pension of 5,000 yuan per month. She was seeking a pensioned man of the right age who owns a house and has the appropriate shengxiao (one of the 12 symbolic animals denoting the year of birth in a 12-year cycle).
When asked whether her daughter knew about this, she replied: “Probably a little bit.”
When pressed further: “Is she supportive,” Li responded: “Well, that’s none of her business.”
She acknowledged that people of her age tend to be more upfront about their situations from the start. The key, she noted, is that “they can talk with each other amiably,” which likely explains why the success rate for the senior demographic appears higher than that for younger individuals.
At this point, a former matchmaker joined the conversation. “Are you searching for a partner? There’s nothing to be ashamed of. You’re seeking someone to share your life and travel with.”
The former matchmaker explained the difficulty for exceptional women in finding Mr Right.
“Men are often valued more for their abilities, while women continue to pursue education. After obtaining a good education and a decent job, they tend to seek similar qualities in their spouses. Over time, they might become more flexible in their expectations, but by then, there are often fewer ‘good men’ available. A significant issue is that men tend to be more accommodating regarding conditions, while women are more adamant,” she observed.
“By comparison, finding a partner seems to be easier for divorcees or those over 50, as they are typically pensioners with fewer financial concerns. Those genuinely seeking a partner are generally more flexible in other aspects. Of course, disagreements may arise if one partner chooses to use their income to support children from a previous marriage,” she said.
“I would always advise these older women clients: You do not crave his money. It is sufficient that he willingly covers your daily expenses, such as food and other necessities.” This differs from the expectations of younger individuals.
However, Peng was more cynical.
“If you observe the situation, these spouse-seeking pensioners are imposing conditions very similar to those of their younger counterparts,” he said, although he conceded that things appear easier for the elderly regarding prenuptial agreements.
There has been considerable social attention on the marriages of senior citizens lately, partly due to the buzz surrounding the movie “Cairou Huntun,” or “Vegetable and Meat Wontons.” This film tells the story of Lao Wang, a widower who appears at the blind-date corner at People’s Park to find a spouse for his son but ends up finding his own romance. The movie, rich in Shanghai culture, resonates with many elderly citizens grappling with loneliness.
A 2021 study by the Institute of Psychology at the Chinese Academy of Sciences, found marriage affects elderly social support and quality of life. Married seniors can handle stress and setbacks better. Given their time and leisure, their efforts to find a partner are admirable for their determination to attain happiness.
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