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How parents react?
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SHANGHAI Women’s Federation and Fudan University interviewed 14 Shanghai families who have lost their only child. Psychological pressure, economic difficulties and uncertainty about the future are among their top concerns.
Here are some of the responses from the participating parents who declined to be named.
“I was drowning in pain at first and was cynical about the world. Later I felt confused about my future, hated society and wanted revenge.”
“The family exists only in name after my child is gone. I don’t see any hope in life. I don’t want to work, and I don’t care about anything in my life. Without my child, my life is dead.”
“I felt so much pain realizing that I would never have a child to visit or take care of me when I get sick and old. How am I supposed to live in the future?”
“My husband and I talk less and less at home. We cannot raise any topics related to children or the whole family will psychologically collapse.”
“I could not sleep for at least one month before my child’s birthday, death anniversary or any festival. Memories of my son when he was alive flashed repeatedly in my brain whenever I glanced at photos of him or anything he had used.”
“We are aging day by day, but we have no one to look after us when we get old or give a proper burial after death. What I lost is not only a child, but the one whom I can rely on both economically and psychologically.”
“With a monthly pension of 1,200 yuan, I can barely feed myself in Shanghai. I feel so insecure about my life. Everything just seems hopeless after my son’s death.”
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