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An invaluable lesson on being tolerant
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After finishing the various stages of the education ladder, I thought I had acquired sufficient knowledge to survive the challenges of society nowadays.
As my fate brought me to China, I realized that my journey to enlightenment was far from over. I discovered that there are invaluable lessons to be learnt about tolerance and compassion from my fellow Chinese, including my wife, through their traditional customs.
During this year’s Qingming Festival, I had a golden opportunity to hone my levels of tolerance and compassion.
Many Chinese believe that death is a stepping stone to another phase of the evolution of the soul. The body may vanish but the soul lives forever. That prompts them to allocate a day on which they spiritually connect with their beloved deceased ones. During Qingming, or the Tomb Sweeping Day, families go to tombs, graves and burial grounds carrying with them tea, wine, chopsticks, joss paper and libation for their ancestors. Some families leave cold food at the tombs and burial grounds.
Foreigners have difficult time understanding the logic behind leaving food at the tombs or sacrificing other objects at the burial sites.
I have my experience with the issue. After I married my Chinese wife and the later death of her mother, she prepared a few dishes of her parents’ favorite food to take to their graves.
Being inquisitive by nature, I asked her about the fate of all that food. She replied that she would leave it there.
To avoid being perceived as an insensitive individual, I held myself from laughing out loud. To be honest, I had a difficult time grasping the concept. However, after further contemplation, I realized that I was being intolerant as well as lacking the compassion to be sympathetic toward those who have different beliefs than mine.
This year, I was determined to be open to the idea, since the practice of leaving food and other commodities at burial sites is common. Foreigners celebrate Memorial Day and they leave flowers, among other objects, at the graves of their beloved relatives. Ancient Egyptians used to bury all life’s essentials with the corpse, believing the body would rise after death and, needs the necessities of life to continue its journey.
Reflecting on the last Qingming Festival, I realized that the event permitted me the opportunity to learn an invaluable lesson of being tolerant toward those with different beliefs than mine.
The author is a Canadian teacher in China.
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