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The heritage of getting hitched
By Hu Min |
April 13, 2011, Wednesday
|
Print Edition
Print Edition
TRADITIONAL customs of marriage in Hangzhou originated from the Southern Song Dynasty (1127-1279), and many delicate etiquettes were involved.
In ancient Hangzhou, middle-class families usually invited a matchmaker to match their offspring. The man and woman then chose an auspicious date to meet each other. The man prepared a gift and visited the woman's home. If the woman was willing to date with the man, she wore a gold hairpin, if not, she presented silk satin to the man in return.
An engagement ceremony was held at the man's home if the relationship proceeded well. They hung up red lanterns and lit red candles. Relatives of the two families were invited to attend the ceremony.
The man would then make a marriage proposal and present a pinli (betrothal gifts), usually gold, silver and silk to the woman's family.
Sometimes rib meat was also presented. Legend has it that there lived a widow surnamed Chen in Shifeng Village near the West Lake. Her daughter was very beautiful and was to marry a scholar. Chen was satisfied with the marriage but at the same time, she felt sad over the loneliness she would face without her daughter.
Her beloved daughter was filial and she said she wouldn't marry if her husband-to-be couldn't make her mother happy.
The man then presented rib meat and tea to Chen. He explained that children were the ribs of mothers and by presenting rib meat, he hoped to bring some relief to the mother. He pledged he would treasure and protect Chen's daughter.
Chen cooked the meat and her mood was lightened gradually.
Presenting rib meat then became a tradition.
The woman's family should prepare a dowry at the same time. Gifts may include tea, lotus seeds, longan, red beans, green beans and red dates which carry auspicious connotation in China, as well as a quilt. It is said that the quilt is sent with the hope that the bride won't suffer from the cold if she quarrels with her husband or mother-in-law.
Before the day of the wedding, the bride's family should prepare a banquet and the bride will express gratitude for her parents during the banquet.
On the day of the wedding, the bride's sedan starts from the groom's home and stops at the bride's family home.
The doorstep of the bride's residence is heavily guarded by the bridesmaid or the bride's sisters. It is customary for the bridesmaid to give the bridegroom a difficult time before he is allowed to enter. Usually wisdom, courage and his friends will help the bridegroom to succeed.
Sometimes he has to distribute red envelopes containing money in order to take his bride home.
The bride then bids farewell to her parents and relatives. She will be led by two maids, one taking a red candle, the other a red lantern, to the sedan chair.
The wedding banquet is the climax. The newlyweds are required to cross their arms to sip wine. They also toast guests. After the banquet, a teasing game starts in the bridal chamber.
The bridegroom will invite the relatives of the bride to his home the next day and the newlyweds will visit the bride's home three days later.
In ancient Hangzhou, middle-class families usually invited a matchmaker to match their offspring. The man and woman then chose an auspicious date to meet each other. The man prepared a gift and visited the woman's home. If the woman was willing to date with the man, she wore a gold hairpin, if not, she presented silk satin to the man in return.
An engagement ceremony was held at the man's home if the relationship proceeded well. They hung up red lanterns and lit red candles. Relatives of the two families were invited to attend the ceremony.
The man would then make a marriage proposal and present a pinli (betrothal gifts), usually gold, silver and silk to the woman's family.
Sometimes rib meat was also presented. Legend has it that there lived a widow surnamed Chen in Shifeng Village near the West Lake. Her daughter was very beautiful and was to marry a scholar. Chen was satisfied with the marriage but at the same time, she felt sad over the loneliness she would face without her daughter.
Her beloved daughter was filial and she said she wouldn't marry if her husband-to-be couldn't make her mother happy.
The man then presented rib meat and tea to Chen. He explained that children were the ribs of mothers and by presenting rib meat, he hoped to bring some relief to the mother. He pledged he would treasure and protect Chen's daughter.
Chen cooked the meat and her mood was lightened gradually.
Presenting rib meat then became a tradition.
The woman's family should prepare a dowry at the same time. Gifts may include tea, lotus seeds, longan, red beans, green beans and red dates which carry auspicious connotation in China, as well as a quilt. It is said that the quilt is sent with the hope that the bride won't suffer from the cold if she quarrels with her husband or mother-in-law.
Before the day of the wedding, the bride's family should prepare a banquet and the bride will express gratitude for her parents during the banquet.
On the day of the wedding, the bride's sedan starts from the groom's home and stops at the bride's family home.
The doorstep of the bride's residence is heavily guarded by the bridesmaid or the bride's sisters. It is customary for the bridesmaid to give the bridegroom a difficult time before he is allowed to enter. Usually wisdom, courage and his friends will help the bridegroom to succeed.
Sometimes he has to distribute red envelopes containing money in order to take his bride home.
The bride then bids farewell to her parents and relatives. She will be led by two maids, one taking a red candle, the other a red lantern, to the sedan chair.
The wedding banquet is the climax. The newlyweds are required to cross their arms to sip wine. They also toast guests. After the banquet, a teasing game starts in the bridal chamber.
The bridegroom will invite the relatives of the bride to his home the next day and the newlyweds will visit the bride's home three days later.
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