Mother from Czech Republic builds big network of friends
By Xie Fangyuan |
January 22, 2013, Tuesday
|
Print Edition
Print Edition
CZECH expat Veronika Santrochova has lived in Suzhou for more than five years, integrating into the community, establishing a social circle of expatriate mothers and learning survival Chinese.
"For me cultural shock is not that big," says 37-year-old Santrochova. "I've been living in Asia for 13 years."
Earlier she lived in Bangkok for four years and Kuala Lumpur for four years. She arrived in 2007 with her Belgian husband Ivo Lavens, whose company opened a production line for a green energy company in Suzhou Industrial Park.
"Every time I move, I start from scratch," Santrochova tells Shanghai Daily. "If I want to live in a country, I need to manage difficulties and accept that I am the foreigner. It is the stranger who needs to adapt to locals not them to you."
It wasn't easy at first, adapting to a city she had never heard of. She arrived with her 10-month-old daughter Ellie and two-year-old son Lukas.
"Coming here with a 10-month-old baby was challenging," Santrochova says, adding there were not many baby products and services in Suzhou five years ago. She had to go to Shanghai to shop and take her children to the doctor.
"Five years ago Suzhou was completely different," she recalls. "At that time, Suzhou was not that developed. Now it's much easier for Westerners to live, Western products and medical service are easily available.
"It was harder then, but I think living overseas makes you self-reliant. You always need to find friends and social circles since you don't have any relatives."
Many times Santrochova is frustrated by the big differences between East and West. "A lot of times I feel like, 'Oh, come on, it doesn't work that way,' but in the end, I am the foreigner living in a country where I chose to live," she says.
She studied New Concept Mandarin for foreigners at a language school, which helps her get around, interact with locals and understand aspects of Chinese culture.
She has built a network in Friends of Dulwich (FoD), comprised of parents of students at Dulwich College Suzhou. The international school, which opened in Suzhou in 2007, enrolls pupils from age 2 to age 18. The study body today comes from 38 countries and regions.
Santrochova is the outgoing chairman of the executive committee of FoD and has formed friendships with many parents. The group organizes school events such as International Day with Suzhou High School and undertakes fund raising projects for local charities.
The annual International Day features the food, costumes, cultures, songs and performances of many countries.
"For foreign parents only here a short time, the event is a good opportunity for them to better understand Chinese culture and other different nationalities," she observes.
Santrochova's arrival more than five years ago coincided with the opening of Dulwich College Suzhou.
"When I arrive in a new place I always feel I need to be part of something, I cannot just stay at home," she says. The school's parents group offered a perfect way to connect and be part of the community.
Since 2008, she has been one of the parent representatives of the school's children's group, DUCKS, for children from age 2 to 6.
These days Santrova is doing marketing for a new English-language shopping website: wowshopping.com.
She observes that some Westerners prefer to stay in the well-known "expat bubble," shutting themselves off from the local culture.
"What's the point of not getting in touch with Chinese people and experiencing the culture, tasting the food and so on?" she asks.
Still, it can be difficult to maintain long-term friendships with Chinese women in her network because quite a few are married to Westerners who move on to other assignments.
"I would call them acquaintances rather than friends," she says, "people come and go."
She says the transient population "makes you adapt, and start over. It's challenging but it makes you stronger because it builds character and helps children learn how important friendship is."
One person who helps Santrochova learn about the community is her ayi, who speaks only Chinese. This means Santrochova is forced to pick up basic Chinese fast, since Western households are run very differently from Chinese households. She needs to explain to her ayi what she wants and if she can't, then she has to demonstrate.
"Every foreign wife could write a book on how to train her ayi and how an ayi works well for Western families," she says, adding that she relies on her ayi in case of emergencies.
Santrocova's eight-year-old daughter now studies Mandarin every day at school.
After over five years, the Czech Republic expat is fond of Suzhou and its combination of history and modernity.
Much has changed during her stay, traffic is much heavier, new buildings pop up and expats have their own cultural center, theaters and cinema. Everything is convenient in the industrial park's residential area, she says.
Santrochova feels very much a part of her community.
"There are many foreign companies and expats in China and in Suzhou, that's why I have a big community around me. Of course, it's still China, but I don't feel like I'm an expat from somewhere else. I feel I'm in a cosmopolitan and vibrant city where I am not alone," Santrochova says.
"For me cultural shock is not that big," says 37-year-old Santrochova. "I've been living in Asia for 13 years."
Earlier she lived in Bangkok for four years and Kuala Lumpur for four years. She arrived in 2007 with her Belgian husband Ivo Lavens, whose company opened a production line for a green energy company in Suzhou Industrial Park.
"Every time I move, I start from scratch," Santrochova tells Shanghai Daily. "If I want to live in a country, I need to manage difficulties and accept that I am the foreigner. It is the stranger who needs to adapt to locals not them to you."
It wasn't easy at first, adapting to a city she had never heard of. She arrived with her 10-month-old daughter Ellie and two-year-old son Lukas.
"Coming here with a 10-month-old baby was challenging," Santrochova says, adding there were not many baby products and services in Suzhou five years ago. She had to go to Shanghai to shop and take her children to the doctor.
"Five years ago Suzhou was completely different," she recalls. "At that time, Suzhou was not that developed. Now it's much easier for Westerners to live, Western products and medical service are easily available.
"It was harder then, but I think living overseas makes you self-reliant. You always need to find friends and social circles since you don't have any relatives."
Many times Santrochova is frustrated by the big differences between East and West. "A lot of times I feel like, 'Oh, come on, it doesn't work that way,' but in the end, I am the foreigner living in a country where I chose to live," she says.
She studied New Concept Mandarin for foreigners at a language school, which helps her get around, interact with locals and understand aspects of Chinese culture.
She has built a network in Friends of Dulwich (FoD), comprised of parents of students at Dulwich College Suzhou. The international school, which opened in Suzhou in 2007, enrolls pupils from age 2 to age 18. The study body today comes from 38 countries and regions.
Santrochova is the outgoing chairman of the executive committee of FoD and has formed friendships with many parents. The group organizes school events such as International Day with Suzhou High School and undertakes fund raising projects for local charities.
The annual International Day features the food, costumes, cultures, songs and performances of many countries.
"For foreign parents only here a short time, the event is a good opportunity for them to better understand Chinese culture and other different nationalities," she observes.
Santrochova's arrival more than five years ago coincided with the opening of Dulwich College Suzhou.
"When I arrive in a new place I always feel I need to be part of something, I cannot just stay at home," she says. The school's parents group offered a perfect way to connect and be part of the community.
Since 2008, she has been one of the parent representatives of the school's children's group, DUCKS, for children from age 2 to 6.
These days Santrova is doing marketing for a new English-language shopping website: wowshopping.com.
She observes that some Westerners prefer to stay in the well-known "expat bubble," shutting themselves off from the local culture.
"What's the point of not getting in touch with Chinese people and experiencing the culture, tasting the food and so on?" she asks.
Still, it can be difficult to maintain long-term friendships with Chinese women in her network because quite a few are married to Westerners who move on to other assignments.
"I would call them acquaintances rather than friends," she says, "people come and go."
She says the transient population "makes you adapt, and start over. It's challenging but it makes you stronger because it builds character and helps children learn how important friendship is."
One person who helps Santrochova learn about the community is her ayi, who speaks only Chinese. This means Santrochova is forced to pick up basic Chinese fast, since Western households are run very differently from Chinese households. She needs to explain to her ayi what she wants and if she can't, then she has to demonstrate.
"Every foreign wife could write a book on how to train her ayi and how an ayi works well for Western families," she says, adding that she relies on her ayi in case of emergencies.
Santrocova's eight-year-old daughter now studies Mandarin every day at school.
After over five years, the Czech Republic expat is fond of Suzhou and its combination of history and modernity.
Much has changed during her stay, traffic is much heavier, new buildings pop up and expats have their own cultural center, theaters and cinema. Everything is convenient in the industrial park's residential area, she says.
Santrochova feels very much a part of her community.
"There are many foreign companies and expats in China and in Suzhou, that's why I have a big community around me. Of course, it's still China, but I don't feel like I'm an expat from somewhere else. I feel I'm in a cosmopolitan and vibrant city where I am not alone," Santrochova says.
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