SARAH Chen called a close friend after midnight, whispering about what she suffered an hour before. Her face was swollen and tears streamed out of her puffy eyes. She tried to keep her voice down to avoid waking her husband.

Chen, a 32-year-old secretary at a privately owned company, had been slapped again by her husband who returned home from a social dinner. Once she opened the door for her drunk husband at midnight, Chen couldn’t help but complain about his returning so late. He slapped her several times, yelling at her that she talked too much.

Domestic violence has been a heated issue in China since the TV series “Don’t Talk to Strangers” aroused wide concern years ago. Many people were surprised at the time to learn that domestic violence occurs not just in remote areas but also in educated families in big cities.

It happens in Shanghai, too.

Chen is only one of thousands of victims. An increasing social awareness of domestic violence has been achieved in the city, with years of education and interference by related governmental departments and social organizations. Still, traditional values such as keeping the “ugly” part of the family secret and fears of divorce, especially among women, prevent many victims from speaking out.

The draft Anti-Domestic Violence Law, circulated since late November, is the government’s latest and perhaps strongest move to combat these acts. It marks the first time that a specific, independent law would be issued against domestic violence, which should further boost public awareness, experts say.

The draft law includes provisions for a reporting system, deprivation of custody of children when necessary and personal safety protection, such as shelter for the victim.

Domestic violence is broadly defined as a pattern of abusive behaviors by one or both partners in an intimate relationship, which includes marriage, family, cohabitation, dating and friends. It has many forms including physical aggression — hitting, kicking, biting, restraining, slapping, shoving, throwing objects — or other threats.

Domestic violence also includes sexual abuse, emotional abuse, controlling or domineering behavior, intimidation and economic deprivation.

Lu Ronggen, deputy chief of the Equity Department of the Shanghai Women’s Federation, says the domestic violence rate in Shanghai stands at 4 percent to 6 percent of all households, while the number was 13 percent before 2010 and 37 percent in 2001 when “domestic violence” was first written into the Marriage Law.

The number is based on reports of violence by victims to either the police or the federation. Apart from an actual drop in cases, different statistical methods also might have contributed to the sharp drop, Lu says.

Though it might not be accurate to state that cases have dropped significantly in Shanghai, Lu observes that more victims are aware that they can seek help. Few people understood domestic violence dozens of years ago, and even fewer would call police for help.

Most reported cases at the Shanghai federation today still involve middle-aged people from working-class backgrounds, while there’s also an increasing number of post-1980s reporting.

Domestic violence occurs among people of all ages, regardless of their economic status and education, says Lu. Emotional problems are still the major trigger of the violence, while disputes about property account for only a small number of cases.

“Women and children are the major victims,” says Lu. “And most domestic violence cases involve long-term repeated violence rather than a one-time thing.”

Zhang Chuhan, a psychologist with her own consulting practice, says people who abuse others “are usually insecure and lack of confidence.”

“They don’t have good communication skills,” Zhang says. “When they don’t know how to reach their communication goal, they use violence.”

Tolerating the violence will only pave the way for further abuse, as the assailant will find violence an effective tool to make the victim shut up and do what he orders. That’s why “zero tolerance” has always been advocated, which means to say no to domestic violence the first time it occurs.

Fear of divorce

However, traditional values still prevail in many Chinese families. Many victims would rather talk to close friends or relatives than report to police or social workers, so they don’t lose face.

Some women don’t want to report for fear of divorce, in which they would also lose face. They choose to tolerate the violence, hoping that their partner will change someday.

Though Chen’s friend urged her to call police, she kept silent, afraid of getting divorced.

“I have divorced friends who remained single for years, as few men of good quality accept women with a marriage history,” says Chen. “My husband is still good to me when he is sober. I don’t want to lose him.”

The draft Anti-Domestic Violence Law may bring significant changes, in Lu’s opinion. Apart from the victims, their relatives and representatives, related aid agencies, social welfare organizations, schools and medical organizations can and should also report when they discover domestic violence, the draft law states. The organizations must take legal responsibility if they fail to do so, and the consequences can be severe.

“That will largely help the reporting network on domestic violence, as it is helpful in filling the blank when the victims hesitate to report,” says Lu. “And it will also pose pressure to the police or other related departments in taking action even if it is not reported by the victim.”

Other highlights include removing the assailant’s guardianship rights in severe cases and providing personal protection so that the victim is safe.

Shanghai lawyer Jason Yao says it’s too early to say whether the law will bring huge changes to the domestic violence situation in China, as it is still a draft with many details to fill in.

“However, making a particular law on domestic violence itself will be a significant move in raising social awareness about the problem and encouraging more victims to stand up for themselves,” he adds.