Matchmakers in rural China see a quieter future
Print Edition
THE month leading up to the Chinese Lunar New Year has always been the busiest for matchmakers like Zhang Kelan in east China’s rural Shandong Province.
People in the countryside like to tie the knot at auspicious times and, traditionally, matchmakers were counted on to find a perfect match.
But for the past few Spring Festivals, business has not been so good.
This year, Zhang, 83, decided it was time to retire. In her half-century career as a matchmaker, Zhang paired 104 couples — an impeccable record in her tiny village.
“All ended in happy marriages. Not a single divorce,” Zhang said.
She attributes her success to her straight-forward character, skillful handling of customs, and an instinct to read parents’ minds.
Though material wealth is not the only criteria, it matters.
“In the 80s, I sized up a family’s wealth by counting their cattle. In the 90s, home appliances. After 2000, houses and cars,” Zhang said.
Chinese villages used to be a closed society. Family patriarchs wielded considerable clout in deciding who their sons and daughters should marry. Matchmakers were entrusted to find the perfect match and smooth over the complicated customs of getting families to agree on bridal dowries and ceremonial details.
Shandong is the home province of ancient philosopher Confucius, and where his teachings on family hierarchy and respect for established rules of behavior take deepest root.
Zhang said it could take up to a year to go through the details — the first meeting, further meetings, proposal, marriage. A small mistake could derail an otherwise happy ending.
However, China’s relentless economic development in the past decades has changed rural life. Many young adults have joined the millions of workers looking for jobs in China’s cities. They meet, get married and settle down. Few now rely on resources from home to find love.
Between 2011 and 2015, 20 million people settled in cities every year. By 2015, permanent urban residents had accounted for 56.1 percent of the country’s population.
Even the few who stay in their villages are becoming tech-savvy. Thanks to the Internet, they can easily meet people on social media, rendering village matchmakers obsolete.
Investors cashing in
Online dating sites have sprung up as investors cash in on the huge market. Jiayuan.com, one such site, listed on the NASDAQ in 2011. It claims to have 160 million registered users, with monthly active users reaching 5.3 million.
While dating sites cater to the needs of urban lonely hearts whose time is largely occupied by work, young adults in rural areas now have more time and freedom to mix and mingle.
“In the past, the bride and the groom could not even meet without matchmakers. Now, few come to us for such an encounter,” Zhang said.
She said she used to be the first person people would come to in the old days.
If she accepted a job, families paid her with gifts of candy, tea, liquor, and sometimes cash of up to 200 yuan (US$29).
“It was not enough to make a living, but I enjoyed doing it as a bit of philanthropy,” Zhang said. “It is always a blessing to see couples live happily ever after.”
There is no estimate for the number of professional matchmakers still working. The job is now largely taken on by relatives.
“As the profession disappears, it means our society has developed,” Zhang said.
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